I have seen this question come up on many mommy groups, lately. I realise how lonely it can get for moms, especially single moms, with so much on their plate.
Remember how easy it was to make friends in elementary school? All you had to do was go up to someone and ask them to check out the cool bug you just found or join you on the swings. Not only were you less worried about being rejected, but you also weren’t as picky about who you were hanging out with. And it certainly didn’t hurt that you had daily opportunities to interact with other kids.
Once you reach adulthood the same rules don’t apply. Our lives (and personalities) are far more complicated, and while we might spend time around our “peers” they may not be the type of people we’d actually get along with. Not to mention the fear of rejection which hits a lot harder than it did when you were a kid.
Cultivating friendships also takes a lot of time, something most of us a short on these days. While it might seem easier to just lament the fact that your friend group is shrinking, there are actually plenty of ways to make friends as an adult—some more obvious than others.
www.verywellmind.com
I hope our blog and social community can be a source of comfort and friendship for all moms and dads, but here are also a few ways to make new friends as an adult:
1. Join a club or group
If you are part of a church, this a great place to make friends with people that have similar values to you. There are other clubs or groups that you can join that won’t take up too much of your time but also offer you the opportunity to connect with new friends, such as:
- Book clubs
- Sport teams (added bonus of exercise)
- Hobby groups (find something you may love)
- Cooking clubs
- Photography groups
2. Volunteer
If you have time, volunteering for causes you care about not only helps your community but also introduces you to others who share your interests and values. Plus, you leave feeling good about the work you have done!
3. Attend Social Events
Attend social events, parties, or community gatherings. If there is nothing happening in your community, why not start a monthly/quarterly event yourself?!
4. Pursue your Interests in Public Spaces
Go to places like parks, cafes, or libraries where you can potentially meet others with similar interests.
To make new or more friends we have to relinquish the myth that friendship happens organically. One study found that the more people thought friendship happened without effort, the lonelier they were five years later. Those who thought making friends required effort were less lonely. Why? They made the effort, showing up at places of worship or volunteering to meet people.
www.panmacmillan.com
Remember, building friendships takes time. Be consistent in attending activities, be open and approachable and be proactive.
Why Friends Matter
Research shows that after the age of 25, most adult friendships start to dwindle. Of course, some of this has to do with changing jobs, getting married, moving, and even having children.
Forming meaningful relationships may become harder as you get older, but it’s well worth the effort. Good friendships have a myriad of benefits, including:
www.verywellmind.com
- Better immune functioning
- Decreased risk of disease, illness, and injury
- Increased longevity
- Reduced stress
- Speedier recovery when sick
“A friend is one who overlooks your broken fence and admires the flowers in your garden.”
Remember, if you don’t have a friend, be a friend. Let’s admire the flowers over the broken fence, let’s lift and love others!
Leave a Comment